"Playboy Mansion visitors come down with mystery illness"
An as-yet-undiscovered venereal disease, we'd venture to guess.
We're just kidding - the cause of the partygoers' distress is speculated to be Pontiac fever, a (fortunately) less-severe form of Legionnaire's Disease.
Better divert a little of your many Playmates' generous allowances into getting those AC ducts and hot tubs cleaned out, Hef.
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